A Kick in the Pants...It's a Good Thing

Weariness. Frustration. Anger. Brokenness. Guilt. Sadness. Frustration (did I mention that already?).

These are some of the emotions that I've been struggling with lately. No, this is not going to be a funny little "pick me up" post that will leave you with a smile on your face. But, it is raw honesty. Honest talk about how even a pastor's wife can struggle....and many times give into the struggle. Gasp! Yes, it's true.

Over the last several weeks, I've been encouraging my small group of high school girls to "be real." I've encouraged them to avoid the typical response of "I'm doing good. I'm fine.", that we are all so guilty of (when we're not doing well at all). I want the girls in my small group to have the freedom and security of telling me where they struggle and how they're hurting. I assure them that they will be loved where they're at, as well as encouraged to take the next step forward, with Jesus' help. I guess it's time for me to listen to some of my own advice.

Just yesterday I came upon a new website designed specifically for Moms http://www.heartsathome.org/. There are several resources there that encourage Moms to stay focused on the Lord through the trials and craziness of motherhood. I spent a good hour pouring over all the blog posts and articles, encouraging me as a mother, a wife, and a child of God. It was so refreshing. So today, I visited that site again, not knowing if there would be anything new to check out. There was. The first thing I clicked on had me in tears before I even finished the third paragraph. Do you ever have those moments when it seems God has literally taken you by the hand and lead you face to face with something He specifically wants you to see? This was so one of those moments for me. Instead of trying to explain what it said, I'll just encourage you to head over there and read it for yourself. I can't copy and paste the article itself, but check out the above website and search for the post entitled "Thankful for Family Trials" written by Jim and Lynne Jackson (no relation).

Did you read it? The line that stuck out so boldly to me was "What's concealed gains power, what's revealed can be healed." Oh yes. I have felt the ever loving, swift kick in the pants! I so often beg God to take away the obstacles in my life; to take away the pain. It is especially in my pain and my struggles that He is showing me AGAIN my great need for Him. It is a mirror that I don't really want to look into. When I fail in my relationships, I often see only my faults. It's then that the guilt, shame, and anger start to flood in. Instead, I need to see how I need to be conformed more into His image. It's amazing how that perspective changes things. Instead of being stuck in those awful feelings, I run back into His arms, knowing He loves me completely, and wants me to take the next step in trusting His instruction. Never easy, but so much easier when I know God loves me right here, right now, in all my ugliness (struggles). He accepts me in my "real" moments, and encourages me to take the next step, with my eyes fully focused on Him. It is only in my admission that I need His hand constantly shaping my heart, that there is healing for me. If I just simply move on from my mistakes, without reflection, all that "junk" will just stay inside....and simmer....and is certain to show its ugly head again in the future. Such a good reminder for me.

It is only because of God's incredible love and grace, that we get those "kicks in the pants." So, be encouraged! "What's concealed gains power, what's revealed can be healed." He's faithful friends and family!