A Kick in the Pants...It's a Good Thing

Weariness. Frustration. Anger. Brokenness. Guilt. Sadness. Frustration (did I mention that already?).

These are some of the emotions that I've been struggling with lately. No, this is not going to be a funny little "pick me up" post that will leave you with a smile on your face. But, it is raw honesty. Honest talk about how even a pastor's wife can struggle....and many times give into the struggle. Gasp! Yes, it's true.

Over the last several weeks, I've been encouraging my small group of high school girls to "be real." I've encouraged them to avoid the typical response of "I'm doing good. I'm fine.", that we are all so guilty of (when we're not doing well at all). I want the girls in my small group to have the freedom and security of telling me where they struggle and how they're hurting. I assure them that they will be loved where they're at, as well as encouraged to take the next step forward, with Jesus' help. I guess it's time for me to listen to some of my own advice.

Just yesterday I came upon a new website designed specifically for Moms http://www.heartsathome.org/. There are several resources there that encourage Moms to stay focused on the Lord through the trials and craziness of motherhood. I spent a good hour pouring over all the blog posts and articles, encouraging me as a mother, a wife, and a child of God. It was so refreshing. So today, I visited that site again, not knowing if there would be anything new to check out. There was. The first thing I clicked on had me in tears before I even finished the third paragraph. Do you ever have those moments when it seems God has literally taken you by the hand and lead you face to face with something He specifically wants you to see? This was so one of those moments for me. Instead of trying to explain what it said, I'll just encourage you to head over there and read it for yourself. I can't copy and paste the article itself, but check out the above website and search for the post entitled "Thankful for Family Trials" written by Jim and Lynne Jackson (no relation).

Did you read it? The line that stuck out so boldly to me was "What's concealed gains power, what's revealed can be healed." Oh yes. I have felt the ever loving, swift kick in the pants! I so often beg God to take away the obstacles in my life; to take away the pain. It is especially in my pain and my struggles that He is showing me AGAIN my great need for Him. It is a mirror that I don't really want to look into. When I fail in my relationships, I often see only my faults. It's then that the guilt, shame, and anger start to flood in. Instead, I need to see how I need to be conformed more into His image. It's amazing how that perspective changes things. Instead of being stuck in those awful feelings, I run back into His arms, knowing He loves me completely, and wants me to take the next step in trusting His instruction. Never easy, but so much easier when I know God loves me right here, right now, in all my ugliness (struggles). He accepts me in my "real" moments, and encourages me to take the next step, with my eyes fully focused on Him. It is only in my admission that I need His hand constantly shaping my heart, that there is healing for me. If I just simply move on from my mistakes, without reflection, all that "junk" will just stay inside....and simmer....and is certain to show its ugly head again in the future. Such a good reminder for me.

It is only because of God's incredible love and grace, that we get those "kicks in the pants." So, be encouraged! "What's concealed gains power, what's revealed can be healed." He's faithful friends and family!

Lovin' Black Bananas

I have enjoyed baking for several years now. But only within the last few years, have I become aware of my love of baking with bananas. You know that yellow thing that is said to be a favorite of monkeys??? Well, that's the fruit, but I like 'em nice and brown...black, actually. I don't eat them right out of the peel when they're black, but I do love to add them to whatever batter I'm stirring up. For those of you who don't know, the darker the banana peel, the more banana flavor you'll have in your baked goods. *Side note* If you put a banana in the freezer (peel on) you will achieve the blackest, yet mold-free, yummiest, banana flavor ever!

Anywho, today I wanted to post two of my favorite things to make, using my beloved blackened bananas :) First off, my own creation, Banana Muffins with Chocolate Peanut Butter Chips. I have just recently concocted this recipe, and actually just made them for the first time today. So beware, they are not FDA approved :) The recipe is as follows :

Banana Muffins with Chocolate Peanut Butter Chips

Ingredients:

1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 egg
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup applesauce (I used apple sauce flavored with cinnamon)
1/2 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 to 2 cups mashed ripe bananas
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate peanut butter chips

Directions:

In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugars, baking powder, baking soda and salt. In another bowl, combine the egg, oil, applesauce, milk and vanilla. Stir into dry ingredients just until moistened. Fold in bananas and chocolate peanut butter chips. Fill greased or paper-lined muffin cups three quarters full. Bake at 350 degrees F for 22-25 minutes or until they spring back to the touch. Cool for 5 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks.

Voila! I will warn you that they are very rich, but have a decadent, comforting depth to them. They go great with a cup of coffee or a cold glass of milk. You will definitely need something to wash them down with. Absolute yumminess :) Hope you like them!


One of my other favorite things to bake, using black bananas is a good, moist loaf of banana bread. Deee-lish! I have made several different versions of banana bread, but this one is always my go-to recipe. I can't take any credit for this one. It's found on allrecipes.com. Follow the directions, as listed :

Banana Bread V

Ingredients

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup white sugar (I use 1/2 cup white and 1/2 cup brown)
1 egg
5 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup butter
1 cup mashed bananas (I use at least 2 cups)
1/2 cup chopped walnuts (optional)

*Note* I also add approximately 2 tsp cinnamon, 1 tsp ground cloves, and 1 tsp nutmeg into the flour mixture.

Directions:

1. Sift together flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt (and spices, if using).

2. In a large bowl, cream sugar and butter. Beat the egg slightly, and mix into the creamed mixture with the bananas. Mix in sifted ingredients, just until combined. Stir in milk and nuts. Spread batter into one greased and floured 9x5 inch loaf pan.

3. Bake at 350 degrees until top is brown and cracks along the top. (about 1 hour)

Well, there you have it! Moist, flavorful banana bread that, in my opinion, is the perfect consistency.

I love baking, especially in the Fall season. For me, it's a way to show love to my family. I know that the time and effort I put into my baking is appreciated when I hear the "mmm's" around the table. Baking goodies is just one small way I can show my appreciation and gratitude for them :)

Fall Festivities!

This was a fun weekend for the Jackson clan. I wasn't sure we would even have much of a weekend at all, because I have been sick and I thought one of the girls was on the verge of getting the flu, as well. Fortunately, everyone is relatively healthy as of right now. Sooo, because of that, we made good use of this gorgeous, sunny weekend. It looks like we've got lots of rain headed our way within the next week, so I'm soaking in as much vitamin D as I can :)

Below are a few pictures of our weekend together. We visited a new pumpkin patch (much closer to our house than last year's pumpkin patch) and it was a huge success! Hay mazes, animals, pumpkins galore, big slides, duck races, pumpkin bowling, a corn maze, and a hay ride that took us to a hilltop with an amazing view. We also saw a pumpkin get launched out of a cannon. Incredible! Lots of fun :)

Saturday, we made our way out to the Hoyt Arboretum and enjoyed an hour long walk along the beautiful wooded trails. We really enjoyed the lookout point where we could see Mt. St. Helens, Mt. Ranier, the base of Mt. Adams, and Mt. Hood. A-MAZ-ING!!! Well, we didn't really officially see Mt. Hood, because the trees were in the way, but we see Mt. Hood all the time, so that wasn't quite as big of a deal ;)

There are a few pictures below of Gracie and Emily together. I took them before they headed off to school. It was picture day and I thought I'd have them practice their "picture taking skills" before they left :) Sometimes those two just melt my heart!

I hope to make a pumpkin pie from scratch this week, since, as I said in the previous post, that is one of my favorite fall traditions! I'll have to let you know if it turns out... Also, next weekend we'll be carving the Jackson family pumpkin and roasting up some delicious seeds. Pictures will follow, I'm sure.

Happy Autumn!!!

Autumn Wishes

It's been a long time, a very long time, since I have been an active member in the blogging community. I have decided it's about time for me to re-engage. My time of absence is over! There is no possible way to sum up what's been happening since July (I can't believe it's been that long!), so I will pick up where we are in the present.

It is the Fall season. I love Autumn. Love it. It has always been my favorite time of year. I assume it has something to do with Thanksgiving and the fact that I love to cook and love to eat what has been cooked. Pure and simple...I like food. Okay, that's another post :) As I think about this very special season, there are things that I look forward to experiencing within the next 2 months; the sights, smells, and tastes that are unique to this time of year. This is my wish list and things I look forward to during this Fall season:

• Making delicious fall treats (pumpkin pie, pumpkin muffins, hot spiced cider, chili)
• The cool, crisp air
• The smell of burning leaves (my second most favorite smell EVER)
• Visiting the pumpkin farm with my family (and sampling the hot cider and donuts!)
• Watching the girls pick out their pumpkins
• Taking a walk with the family through the woods and seeing the vibrant, awesome colors
• Celebrating Hannah's 8th birthday
• The annual Harvest Party at our church
• Thanksgiving
• Wearing a cozy sweater and jeans
• The anticipation of Christmas
• Cuddling in front of the fireplace on a cool night

I'm hoping this Autumn doesn't pass as quickly as they usually do. It seems like I blink and it's over. I want to take in every last drop before it's gone! Ultimately this time of year is a reminder that once again points to my Creator. Every time I see Mt. Hood (which is covered in snow again!) I see God's awesomeness. Every time I see the bright orange and red leaves, I am reminded of God's creativity. My heart rejoices in thanksgiving as I spend time with my family, whether picking out the family pumpkin, or walking through the woods together, the leaves crunching under our feet. And as gorgeous as I think my surroundings are now, I cannot even fully imagine what it will be like in heaven someday; beautiful and perfect in every way. Absolute paradise...beyond my imagination! But I certainly see glimpses of His handiwork now, and for that I am thankful.

Speaking of Fall favorites, I have Chicken 'n Dumplings in the slow cooker right now, and the clock is telling me that it's ready! I hope to be back soon, hopefully with pictures of our trip to the pumpkin farm. Enjoy this gorgeous season and all it has to offer!

Let Me Bring You Up To Speed Here...

Okay, so it's July 7th..... JULY!!! How in the world did that happen? I cannot believe how quickly the summer is flying by. Things always seem to be somewhat crazy in the Jackson household (controlled chaos), but I'm tellin' ya, it's been busy!!

So what have we been up to? Let's see... graduation parties, weddings, play dates, birthday parties, meetings, trips to the park, happy hour at Sonic (Yay!), hiking, picnicking, vacation Bible school, and generally trying to keep the kids from saying "Mom, there's nothing to do. I'm bored!" So, that's pretty much it in a nutshell. I've decided to stick all these summer memories in a slide show, and share that way.

We'll be camping on the coast in a couple weeks and hopefully I'll have some good stories (and pics) to share from that.

Oh...ya know what? This is totally random and way off topic, but if I don't blog about it now, I never will. A couple weeks ago Lyndsey (age 9) and Gracie (age 5) were playing around and pretending to jab each other, as would a boxer. They were being gentle with each other, of course, and Gracie threw a jab and hit Lynds on the left side of her chest, right around her heart. It didn't really hurt, and Lyndsey didn't complain, but Gracie exclaimed "Oh, I'm sorry, I woke him up!" Lyndsey said "What? Woke who up?" Grace responded "Jesus. He's in your heart and I think I woke him up!" Crack me up!!! These are the things I want to remember, and share with them when they're older, but sure I'll forget. It was so sweet :)

Okay, story number 2, which is just as off topic as the last story. The other day Adam was getting ready in the bathroom and Emily walked up to him and gave him a good jab in the gut. (Our girls really aren't that violent, but it sure sounds that way!) She didn't say anything, but just kept staring at Adam. Adam then said to her, "What was that?" Emily's response: "A piece of me!" Crack me up again! Emily and Grace often go around saying "You want a piece of me? I'll give you a piece of me!" Oh man, they make me laugh :)

Okay, now that I have shared all of that, I am ready to share our pictures which pretty much summed up our month of June and the beginning of July. Enjoy your summer, friends :)

It's All Good

The last week or so has been a reminder of how much I have to be thankful for. Not everything has been perfect; it's not as if life is just cruising along without any problems or cares. There are things that keep me prayerfully seeking the Lord's direction. Life is still a matter of daily surrendering to His desires, which are slowly becoming my desires. It's still a struggle. But, lately I have had an overflow of God's goodness. There's never a time where His goodness is less or more, but maybe I am just more aware of it lately.

I think I'll use pictures to illustrate the things that have made my heart sing within the past week.

Having fun with my amazing family

Having fun with amazing friends

Green toe socks make me laugh

Making new friends and enjoying lots of laughter

Shopping and getting fantastic bargains

Enjoying a beautiful sunset over the Pacific Ocean

Knowing I was missed while away from home

Savoring coffee from the coffee shop down the street. Yum!

Learning and being challenged by reading an incredible book. I highly recommend it!

Planting PINK azalea bushes

My life is full of God's unending grace, love, and joy! I am so thankful for the times when I am "extra" aware of His greatness. Whether I am crawling through the dessert, or basking in the sun and blue skies, my God is good all the time. All the time my God is good. It's all good, my friends :)

Does A Mama's Heart Good!

Mother's Day has come and gone again for 2009. Every year it's a day of remembrance for me. I take time throughout my day to remember becoming a mom to my 4 precious girls. I remember the day each one was born and then recall how each girl has grown so much since then. I ponder on how they've filled my life so completely.

When I was very little (maybe 4 or 5) I knew then that I wanted to be a wife and mom. It's ALL I really wanted for my future. I recall my high school banquet at my church the year I graduated. We were to tell everyone what our plans were for college/work and what our life goals were. Even then, my only desire was to be a wife and mom. I'm sure it sounded silly, but it truly was one of my biggest dreams. I remember after announcing that as my "goal," someone saying to me "Ok, but besides that, what do you want to do??" Well, I only knew who I wanted to be. I wanted to be my husband's best friend and helper. I wanted to be the mom who spent time talking with her kids and teaching them things. I wanted to be the one to nurse them through sickness (Boy, have I been able to do that this year!!!), comfort them when they had a bad dream, and assuming I had a girl (try 4 girls!) I wanted to paint toenails, go shopping for earrings, and sing and dance together. I wanted to teach them about Jesus and His immense love for them. IT'S ALL I EVER WANTED!! :)

Needless to say, God blessed me beyond measure and gave me a husband who keeps loving my-imperfect-self, and 4 beautiful daughters who melt my heart on many occasions. Speaking of melting my heart, I had something from our second daughter, Hannah, that I wanted to share.

The week before Mother's Day was my birthday. I was spoiled rotten by my family and loved every minute of it :) When I was ready for church, I came downstairs to find cards and gifts awaiting me. Sweet! Hannah's card was especially touching. You might not be able to make out the pictures very well, but I'll write what she had written, spelling as is.

This is the front page...I think it's legible.

Why do I like Mommy? Because she is sweet. She is nice. She cooks delicious food.

She buys me toys. She cares for me and the hole family. She helps me when I am sikc.

She helps me with my homework. She buys food for the family. She gave me a room. She loves me.

She goes out to the store with me. She does lots and lots of work. She is a Qreen. And that is why I like mommy.

In this book Hannah is telling about why she likes mommy.

And that right there makes me so incredibly thankful to be Hannah's mom! And Lyndsey' mom. And Gracie's mom. And Emily's mom. I have been blessed :)

So Sweet!

As I said in my last post, my parents came for a visit this past weekend. It was for a short time, but I enjoyed every minute of it. Almost all of the pictures we took are on my parents' camera, but there was one shot in particular that we took on our camera. I had to share it with you because I LOVE IT!!!

I will be posting more pics later, but just had to share this one of Lyndsey and her Grandpa :) It's just so sweet!!!

On a side note~ Mom and Dad, I wish you could see Portland now....the sun is actually shining and you can see lots of blue sky :)

The Countdown

We found out last month that my parents are coming from Ohio to visit us. Very exciting, of course, but for our 4 girls it seemed so far off in the future.

Last weekend the girls were being "crafty" and started making a paper chain. As they were busy at work, Gracie asked me (for probably the 100th time) how long until Grandma and Grandpa got here. I responded (for probably the 100th time) "27 more days." And then I decided that the paper chain they were making could serve a purpose. I proposed that we put a "link" in the chain equal to the days left until Grandma and Grandpa's arrival. They were happy to finish their masterpiece and hang it up.

So now when someone says "How much longer 'til Grandpa and Grandma come?" I only need point them to the countdown chain and they can tally it up themselves. I figure I'm strengthening their math skills, right? *wink*

They actually had a lot of fun doing it as a team and they take turns for the daily removal of one of the links. We're looking forward to the upcoming visit, and although it will be short, I'm sure it will be sweet too! Speaking of sweet....

I decided to hop in too

Family Photos

It's been a very long time since we've had professional pictures taken of our family . I believe Hannah was only 2 and the twins were just starting to "bake in the oven." So, I guess we're looking at a good 5 years. Yikes. Way overdue.

Last month we finally got the chance to have them taken. We wanted to get them done sooner, but we had to wait for Emily's black eye to go away. That's another story, though. Anywho, I had all 4 girls in their outfits, hair done, and practiced smiles in place. We were ready. The photo studio is close to the church my husband works at, so he just met us there.

To make a long, drawn out story somewhat shorter, we finally got them all taken. Grace and Emily were all smiles the whole time and Hannah Boo was such a ham....sometimes smiling a little too much :) Lyndsey, our oldest, shed some tears before our family shots were taken, so we didn't have too many to choose from where she was smiling and didn't have red, swollen eyes. Oh well. Eventually she warmed up and we got some awesome shots of the 4 girls.

I thought I'd share a few of my favorites.

Stylin'

I wanted to post this last week. Guess I forgot. Better late than never.

Sometime last week, I told the twins to go upstairs and get dressed after breakfast. They usually ask what they should wear, but this day they didn't, and I didn't offer any suggestions. I thought they could handle this decision on their own. Gracie did pretty well picking out her attire for the day. The colors probably weren't the combination mommy would've picked, but some battles just aren't worth fighting, ya know? ;) I waited for Emily to come downstairs so I could see her outfit of choice. Emily has a style all her own. Exhibits A and B....

Man, I love that girl of mine! She's got spunk!

Cinnamon Coffee Cake

I found this recipe for coffee cake a few years ago, and it's become a staple in our house. It's not really made "from scratch," but does taste like it. I always have the ingredients on hand, so it's super easy to throw together. Hope you like it!

Ingredients:

1 (18.25 oz) package yellow cake mix

1 (3.4 oz) package instant vanilla pudding mix

1 (3.4oz) package instant butterscotch pudding mix

4 eggs

1 cup water

1 cup vegetable oil (I always use 1/2 cup oil and 1/2 cup applesauce to cut down on the oil)

1 cup packed brown sugar

1 Tablespoon ground cinnamon

1 cup chopped walnuts (pecans are yummy too)

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease either a 9x13 inch baking pan, or a 10 inch bunt pan.

In a bowl stir together the cake mix and pudding mixes. Add the eggs, oil (or half oil and half applesauce) and water, and mix until blended. In another bowl, stir together the brown sugar, cinnamon and nuts. Pour half the batter into pan and spread evenly. Sprinkle with half the nut mixture. Cover with the rest of the batter, and sprinkle with the rest of the nut mixture.

Bake for 20 minutes, then turn the oven down to 325 degrees and bake for an additional 35 to 40 minutes. Let sit for about 10 minutes after baking.

Enjoy!

My Name Should Be Forgetful Fran

Okay, it's been one of those days. And as you can see by the time this was posted, it's not even close to being lunch time yet. I can only hope this day goes uphill from here. Sigh.

I have forgotten (or nearly forgotten) all of these things today. Hang in there, it's a long list!

• I forgot to set my alarm last night. My hubby gets up early for elder meetings on Friday, so he wasn't around to wake me up either. Needless to say, I woke up about 15 minutes late and therefor set the stage for the rest of my blunder-filled morning. Read on if you dare...


• I forgot to put coffee beans in the coffee maker before turning it on. I noticed the grinder sounded weird when running, but didn't really notice it until my brewed coffee looked strangely like water.


• I forgot today was hat day for Lyndsey and Hannah at school. Fortunately my girls reminded me before we left.


• I forgot to grab Hannah's weather box (a project she's been working on for school that's due today) before heading out the door this morning. (I did remember it before we left our subdivision though)


• I forgot to make Lyndsey a ham, cheese and mustard sandwich instead of the peanut butter and jelly that was already packed in her lunch bag. After some tears (Lyndsey's, not mine) I made a second sandwich. Good news? I now have a PB&J sandwich made for one of the twins' lunches :)


• I forgot to grab my purse before driving the girls to school. Yes, I drove about 5 miles without my license. So sue me.


• I forgot to put on some "essential clothing" before taking the girls to school. I was scared to death I'd get in an accident and be taken to the hospital without this "essential" item. Way too personal? Sorry.


• I forgot to grab Hannah's spelling words before we left for school. It's a Friday morning ritual to do a quick review of her words during our commute, before her big spelling test. I forgot the list of words, and Hannah could only remember 3 of them. I am prepared to take full responsibility if she does poorly on her spelling test today.


• I forgot to go out early and scrape the frost off the van windows. Almost every morning I scrape the windows and have the van toasty warm for the 5 minute drive to the school. Taking the time to clear the windows only made us later than we already were! Aaarrgghh.


• Lastly (I think), I almost forgot the twins. Yes, it's true. I had Lyndsey, Hannah, lunch bags, backpacks, the weather box, my coffee (the real kind) and myself in the van. The twins had been upstairs playing dress up while I was flying around like a crazy person. I did remember to put them in the van before leaving the driveway. At least I wasn't halfway to school when I remembered. Oy.

So, that's my day so far. Do you think I'm totally losing it? Oh, it's very possible, I assure you! I really need to get the twins dressed in something other than dress-up, take a shower, and head to the library and the store for some stuff I've been meaning to pick up all week. Oh, and I need to get the mail too. I've forgotten to check my box for the last two days now. Yikes! I really hope this is a phase... I'm too young for senility, aren't I?

Have a happy Friday, all!

*UPDATE*

It is now about 12:45 in the afternoon and I can truly say, this day hasn't changed course much. I'm at the point where I need to laugh about the events of my day, or otherwise risk losing my mind. A few minutes ago I said to Emily "Em, Mommy has lost her marbles! What should I do about that?" Emmy's reply: "Find them." I think this pic sums up how I've felt since waking up this morning. It's good to laugh :)

5....times 2!

Sunday was a big day for the Jackson family. The two youngest members of our clan turned 5 years old! Yikes! The time has passed so quickly since their birth. It really does seem like only yesterday.... sigh.

I was two days away from scheduling my appointment to induce labor, but the twins were ready now. I remember having such mixed emotions when I started having contractions. Part of me was absolutely ecstatic! I had a very healthy pregnancy with the twins, but, oh my goodness, was it ever uncomfortable! And when I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant everywhere, not just my tummy. I had two babies stuffed in a rather small compartment. Although skinny didn't describe me at all, I was (still am) on the short side. There was no extra room. I cannot express just how "blow fish-like" I felt. So, because of that, and the fact that I was so anxious to meet my little ones face to face, I was thinking delivery would be great.

On the other hand, it was 2 weeks too early for these little ones to be born. I was only 34 weeks along, and I wasn't considered full term (for twins) until I was 36 weeks. I knew it was critical for them to have as much time in the womb as possible. After a couple hours of contractions my husband took me to the hospital, only to be assured that I was definitely in labor, already dilating, and these little ones were on their way.

To make a long story short, it was a blessing that my daughters came as early as they did. Little did my doctor know that inside the womb, the babies were having a twin to twin blood transfusion. Little Emily was taking all of Gracie's blood. Needless to say, Grace was born very anemic, and Emmy was born with too much blood. They were both very sick at birth. If they had gone another two weeks in the womb, like they were supposed to, Gracie most likely would not have survived, and the doctor thought Emily might not have made it either. Praise God that He saw fit to bring them early. Well, not really early, more like right on time. I cannot even fathom not having these two little girls as part of our family. They're miracles.

I remember the two weeks after their birth, visiting them in the NICU. They were so tiny and had so many wires hooked up to them. It broke my heart to see them so small and helpless, and yet I distinctly remember having such joy and peace through that time. It was a while until I could even hold them for more than a couple minutes at a time. I cherished the times I would rock them (wires, tubes, and all) and eventually feed them in the NICU. Reaching into their incubators and just touching them was never enough. I longed to cuddle them and smell their baby smell. I ached for them when I wasn't with them. But eventually they were big enough and strong enough to come home. Then, once they were home, it was a whole new lesson in how to "do" multiple newborns. That's a whole other story :)

Grace Katherine and Emily Kate, I love you so much! You are a constant reminder of God's grace and faithfulness. Happy 5th birthday my little ones!

Below are some pictures taken during their birthday celebration.

That's What I Said

Last Friday morning the twins and I dropped Lyndsey and Hannah off at school. We often drive through a particular neighborhood on our way home. While we were driving through this neighborhood, Gracie exclaimed suddenly "Mom, I just saw rocka momma!" My mind quickly went through all the possibilities of what "rocka momma" meant in 4 year old terms. I wasn't sure I had heard her correctly, and asked her to please repeat herself. "I saw rocka momma in the window...in that house!" Grace was starting to get frustrated that I didn't understand what she was so clearly saying.

Finally it hit me. Several homes along the street had pictures of Barack Obama sitting in their windows. Then I also remembered that Grace and Emily's preschool class had been learning about past presidents and also the new president we now have. "Oh," I said. "You mean you saw a picture of Barack Obama?" Gracie's reply: "Yea. That's what I said, Mom!"

It just brought a little giggle to my day, and maybe it will for you too :)

From the Lips of Babes...

Monday evening I was zipping around the house trying to clean up a bit since we had a sitter coming to watch our girls. My friend and her daughter were due in about 30 minutes and I hadn't even showered yet. I was stressed! Never mind the fact that my husband and I were finally getting some time to ourselves without the kids. Never mind that I was going to be treated to a nice dinner out, where I didn't have to prepare any of the food. Nope, I was only concerned about the fact that things weren't going the way I wanted them to. Not good.

When all 4 girls were seated at the table, I asked our 7 year old daughter to please pray for their dinner. Holding hands and heads bowed, Hannah happily agreed to my request. As I was washing some dishes and grumbling about how I didn't have enough time to get ready, I overheard this simple and sweet prayer. "Dear Lord, thank you for this food and for this water. Thank you for giving me a family that loves me. And thank you for my sisters. And even though you didn't give us any boys, thank you just in case you decide to give us one. Amen." I think I first stifled a laugh, just because I was so tickled :) But then I thought to myself that here is a 7 year old who realizes that God is not limited. No, He has not chosen to give us a little boy, but that doesn't mean He won't. Personally, I hope we don't have a son until I can refer to him as my daughter's husband....just because I'd like to be done having children. However, I realize that God could certainly choose to bless us with another little one. Believe me, that would certainly be a miracle!!!

Even though I thought her prayer was cute, she reminded me that God is the only one that truly knows what the future holds. It's very easy to respond "No honey, God isn't giving us anymore children. We're done with that part of life. Yep, DONE!" But, as with everything else, He is ultimately in control, and I have to trust that His plan is the best plan. And I need to honor God while I walk that path He's chosen for me. So whether it's having another baby, a failing economy, or the doctor giving me very grim news, I know that nothing takes Him by surprise (even though I might initially be drowning in disbelief). I trust my God, He is worthy of that. It is always in my weakness that His strength, mercy and grace are so apparent.

And so these are the thoughts that came from hearing my little girl's prayer. She, as she has so many times before, reminded me of God's unwavering strength and love, and made me pause to look at my own heart.

By the way, my husband and I had a great date that night :) God is good.

The Tie That Binds

As I explained in my prior post, 2008 definitely brought some trials, and obviously some of those same trials have followed me into 2009. However, in the midst of tough times, there are good times too.

I have so appreciated the friendships I have developed since moving here to Oregon. I've thanked God on many occasions for these kindred hearts. They've become quite dear to me. There's a certain group of ladies that now have a tradition of "closing down" any restaurant that we're eating at. Once the visiting starts, it seems there's always "one more thing" that needs to be discussed or shared :) I cherish these times, and again give thanks to God because He is the ultimate tie that binds us.

Thank you Lord for friendship, for laughter, for caring hearts. And what relationship could ever survive without grace? You have blessed me once again in a way that words cannot adequately express.

We look so sweet and proper, don't we? Oh yeah, and then there's this: